Your Self Esteem.
For as selfish as people are, no one really likes themselves. There is always something more, something better, something different you could be, but you won't try to be because you don't actually believe you can be. And that is perfectly OK.
There is no reason to believe you could be better than what you are. If you believe it, you might actually want to do it, and that means doing work. You know your work will only be sub-par so why bother in the first place? Yes, it's just plain useless to like yourself enough to change your shitty situation. Your already a champion drinker and you have so many friends you don't know what to do with...your happy...so there is nothing else you need anyway.
Ladies, ever rethink that abusive relationship your in? Don't bother. Out of the 6+ billion people in this world, you wont find anyone else better so you might as well just get used to getting your ass beat when your man comes home every night. I know, I know...he doesn't mean it, they never do...just keep reminding yourself he hits you because he loves you and you might get a shiny new necklace out of it when he sobers up and feels bad. After all, he has already banned you from leaving the house in fear of you having a good time without him or fucking every guy you might pass on the street, so who cares if your body is covered in bruises? No one will see them but you.
Relationship not going so well, kids? Just get pregnant. It doesn't matter that your not old enough to legally drink yet, or that you don't have a job...if you have a baby, you will always have someone who loves you. You aren't in school and your boyfriend doesn't want you anymore, but that baby needs you so it must mean your life is worth something, right? You certainly aren't going to end up raising one more person in this country that also doesn't want to work hard and feels it's their right to be on welfare. If you do, that's fine too, your son will just sue someone for something that was probably their own fault for being stupid and you will have the money you always hoped your children would have. At least you will now be able to afford all those friends you keep around to help you feel popular!
I didn't forget about you either Mr. Addict. The money you steal from other people to pay for your problems is actually helping the drug dealer support the baby his girlfriend wanted, so keep it up big guy, the economy needs you right now. When you sit at the bar all weekend, you are making sure that establishment will not go out of business. When you drunkenly stumble to your car so you can get home to beat your wife for not vacuuming under the refrigerator, you keep the cops from slacking at their job. You are as much of a winner as you will ever be. Embrace it.
Now that you feel justified for being a loser, and a lazy one at that, keep up the good work...if you can call doing nothing with your life "work". Being around you makes everyone else realize they don't hate themselves as much as they thought. If you weren't a failure, how would we know who the winners were? Thank you for making me look better as a person.
unequally yours,
Sarah M.
