Every working stiff has just one goal. To earn enough to not work anymore. Well my friends, I am here to tell you it's worth a load of elephant poo.
You get up early, you make yourself up to look nice for the world, you hustle to your favorite spot to wait for the train with everyone else, you make it to work 10 minutes early to be ready when it's time to start, you bang out a productive work day and make your trek home for the night where you make dinner, do chores, and go to bed early to make sure you can do it all the next day. You work hard, you budget your time and money, you even give up hobbies to make more time to make more money. This is your plan for the next 50 years of your life and while it sucks, and you know it sucks, and everyone standing next to you waiting for the train is thinking about the same way their life sucks too, the only thing that keeps you going is the thought of retiring early and using your hard earned savings to enjoy laying around, floating from new place to new place, and never having to do a days work again...Problem? You are doing it wrong.
There is a faster and easier way to get to the "50 years from now" life you feel the need to imagine to get you through your present, and that is called being a bum. No one wants to be a bum except for bums because only they know the real happiness that comes from just getting by, kind of the way only a stripper wants to be a stripper because she knows money is the tits, and is as easy to get as showing them. Bums sit around wherever they want all day being given things from strangers just for existing. Think about the last time you didn't shower for a week...did anyone give you a dollar? Probably not. But how many dollars in bills or loose change have you given out to strangers this week? You could have saved that money...you need it 50 years from now remember? Now that guy who hasn't taken a shower in a week has it to do whatever he'd like with it, and you can't even buy yourself your morning coffee.
What better job could there be than to not have to worry about having a job? That guy who just took your change and didn't even say 'thank you' is already laying around, floating from new place to new place, and isn't the least bit concerned about where his next meal or cigarette will come from and certainly isn't concerned about working to get them. You, on the other hand, are stressing out about how you are going to pay your bills while reading this blog to procrastinate work to certify that you will have a job to do tomorrow and every other day for the next 40-something years. And the ones who are not are only trying to convince themselves that they would rather be miserable and stressed out, rather scrimp and save for an uncertain future, than coast along without any worries because society tells them people get more out of life when they are clean and pretty and rich (you're sure you're at least one of those...right?) those people probably need to read more of my previous posts too
The obvious answer is to quit...everything. Stop trying to look nice, stop working, stop having dreams. Just plain stop depending on a future that you can't predict. Wouldn't you be even more miserable if you spent your life being miserable so you could be rich and happy one day and you died from an anxiety attack before you got to be rich and happy? If everyone decided to live their life without the restrictions of what society tells us is what we need to be happy, society would crumble and we could all go back to the field-frolicking, before-common-era civilizations that promoted art, science, and imagination. Everyone would understand the importance of having nothing and would be more apt to share. People would be nicer to one another, and social classes would start to fade. Doing nothing is definitely the fastest way to do nothing!
I wish you all luck with your new lifestyles! As for me, it's time to get back to work...
lazily yours,
Sarah M
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Tis the Season
Hoodie and Flip-flop season that is!
In the very rare and weird case that you don't know what a hoodie or flip-flops are, let me explain. A hoodie is a jacket with a hood. Simple enough, right? Generally they have a zipper as opposed to pulling it over your head. Although both are technically hoodies, I personally prefer the zipper as you can then match your shirt to your hoodie and wear it as an accessory to your outfit rather than just a jacket to keep you warm.
Flip-flops are what Australians call "thongs." In America though, a "thong" is underwear worn by young women who want to appear as if they have no pantie line in their tight pants, or who want to seem easy by letting the top strings peek out of their pants to resemble something like a slingshot. Flip-flips however, are shoes, or sandals if you will. They are made of a flat sole with a Y shaped strap that holds between the first and second toes. Very freeing indeed.
So why the hype about hoodies and flip-flops? For starters, they're just plain comfortable! Comfortable and fun! A hoodie can be any color, pattern or length you prefer. It isn't just a jacket, but a fashion statement. Personally, I wear the short hoodies that only cover the upper chest with dresses, baggy hoodies with tighter clothing, or an outrageously vivid hoodie with my dark solid color slacks to add just a little bit of pizazz to my mundane "business casual" attire. Flip-flops can be just as outrageous, or a solid color, but are super easy to match to anything! Two pair could last you an entire "season" - One in black and one in a lighter bright color of your preference - You now have all the shoes you need from May to October!
Another reason is the signification of the "season" itself - "Hoodie and Flip-flop season" runs from the first nice day in May (no need to wait until Memorial Day) until about Halloween or some time after depending on your current earthly location. Which is basically an extended summer. Who doesn't want to believe their summer is longer than the three months designated by the school system? Being a working adult, I don't get a summer vacation or a three month stint away from work, so I will choose to make my "summer" as long as I damn well please. If wearing hoodies and flip-flops instead of coats and shoes means one can pretend it is summer for 7 months instead of 3, then doesn't this season explain it's own reason for being? "Hoodie and Flip-flop season" is an easy fun way for adults to pretend they are enjoying themselves more so than if they were doing the same thing they would be doing anyway, but didn't get to be a little comfortable and expressive while doing it.
At the end of the day, you could chalk the whole thing up to laziness (picking one jacket and slipping on shoes instead of contemplating an entire outfit) but it doesn't detract from the fact that it still makes you feel good. Yes, quite often it is the simple things in life that make us feel the best. So kick off your shoes and slip into your flip- flops. Hang up your coat and grab a hoodie. Relax and let a little color make the smile on your face even wider. It's hoodie and flip-flop season...embrace it for as long as you can!
Cheerfully yours,
Sarah M.
In the very rare and weird case that you don't know what a hoodie or flip-flops are, let me explain. A hoodie is a jacket with a hood. Simple enough, right? Generally they have a zipper as opposed to pulling it over your head. Although both are technically hoodies, I personally prefer the zipper as you can then match your shirt to your hoodie and wear it as an accessory to your outfit rather than just a jacket to keep you warm.
Flip-flops are what Australians call "thongs." In America though, a "thong" is underwear worn by young women who want to appear as if they have no pantie line in their tight pants, or who want to seem easy by letting the top strings peek out of their pants to resemble something like a slingshot. Flip-flips however, are shoes, or sandals if you will. They are made of a flat sole with a Y shaped strap that holds between the first and second toes. Very freeing indeed.
So why the hype about hoodies and flip-flops? For starters, they're just plain comfortable! Comfortable and fun! A hoodie can be any color, pattern or length you prefer. It isn't just a jacket, but a fashion statement. Personally, I wear the short hoodies that only cover the upper chest with dresses, baggy hoodies with tighter clothing, or an outrageously vivid hoodie with my dark solid color slacks to add just a little bit of pizazz to my mundane "business casual" attire. Flip-flops can be just as outrageous, or a solid color, but are super easy to match to anything! Two pair could last you an entire "season" - One in black and one in a lighter bright color of your preference - You now have all the shoes you need from May to October!
Another reason is the signification of the "season" itself - "Hoodie and Flip-flop season" runs from the first nice day in May (no need to wait until Memorial Day) until about Halloween or some time after depending on your current earthly location. Which is basically an extended summer. Who doesn't want to believe their summer is longer than the three months designated by the school system? Being a working adult, I don't get a summer vacation or a three month stint away from work, so I will choose to make my "summer" as long as I damn well please. If wearing hoodies and flip-flops instead of coats and shoes means one can pretend it is summer for 7 months instead of 3, then doesn't this season explain it's own reason for being? "Hoodie and Flip-flop season" is an easy fun way for adults to pretend they are enjoying themselves more so than if they were doing the same thing they would be doing anyway, but didn't get to be a little comfortable and expressive while doing it.
At the end of the day, you could chalk the whole thing up to laziness (picking one jacket and slipping on shoes instead of contemplating an entire outfit) but it doesn't detract from the fact that it still makes you feel good. Yes, quite often it is the simple things in life that make us feel the best. So kick off your shoes and slip into your flip- flops. Hang up your coat and grab a hoodie. Relax and let a little color make the smile on your face even wider. It's hoodie and flip-flop season...embrace it for as long as you can!
Cheerfully yours,
Sarah M.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
if MADD has a face, consider it slapped
MADD just couldn't resist...and neiher could I
A while back I have a post about how much MADD pisses me off. Their constant bombardment of donation requests and phone calls have gone far beyond my expectations. MADD is worse than an ex who just doesn't understand the word "no" and thinks that being ignored just means you want them around twice as much.
I tired to ignore them but they couldn't help but send me another invoice, marked as if it is past due, and they are wondering where my second donation is. They even tried to bend for me a little by informaing me that as much as they would appreciate the $147 donation, they would be ok with a $37 donation. I never liked being ignored either, so instead of trying to avoid MADD, I have sank to their level and decided to send them a little letter of my own. I hope they get the picture this time:
Dear MADD,
I do not wish to donate to your “Annual Fund Drive” or any of your other vague “Drives” that never explain exactly what action is being taken and why you need so much money to ask legislation to change their laws. I do not wish to give my support to an organization that has made NO progress in the past year. I do not wish to donate to a law being changed that will cause taxes to be raised to pay for the devices you would like to make “mandatory”. In fact, I would greatly appreciate your reimbursement of the original donation I have made as I have recently witnessed a person who caused an accident because they were drinking and driving yet did not get a ticket for the DUI let alone a mandatory ignition interlock.
As wonderful as the ignition interlock device sounds, it still would not prevent driving under the influence. The device does not send a signal to the authorities and give the plate number of the driver to which the authorities could seek out the offender and take them in. The device simply keeps a record that may not be checked for 30 days and in some cases up to 90 days. The driver has at least an entire month to keep drinking and driving. This is not to mention that an ignition interlock device would only be put on a vehicle AFTER an incident has already occurred, or that someone else could blow into the device once it is placed in a vehicle, regardless of how many times it may need to be blown into. The ignition interlock would also not be able to detect a person under the influence of marijuana, cocaine, heroin, prescribed medication, and any other drug that would also impair a person’s ability to drive a vehicle.
Keep the original donation as my gift to you for suckering me into donating in the first place with your bologna sob stories. Please take me off your call and mailing list as the information you have for me is my work environment and it is extremely unprofessional to be spammed at work when all I thought I was doing was being nice by making the initial donation without questioning why I was sending it at all. I suggest you gear your organization toward the education of the importance of safe driving to people of all ages, but specifically the younger generations. Start at the root of the problem, not after the problem has occurred. Prevent these situations at all through education at an early age rather than try to prevent something that has already happened. Start a program with the local department of transportation instead of trying to change laws.
Good luck.
Sarah M
A while back I have a post about how much MADD pisses me off. Their constant bombardment of donation requests and phone calls have gone far beyond my expectations. MADD is worse than an ex who just doesn't understand the word "no" and thinks that being ignored just means you want them around twice as much.
I tired to ignore them but they couldn't help but send me another invoice, marked as if it is past due, and they are wondering where my second donation is. They even tried to bend for me a little by informaing me that as much as they would appreciate the $147 donation, they would be ok with a $37 donation. I never liked being ignored either, so instead of trying to avoid MADD, I have sank to their level and decided to send them a little letter of my own. I hope they get the picture this time:
Dear MADD,
I do not wish to donate to your “Annual Fund Drive” or any of your other vague “Drives” that never explain exactly what action is being taken and why you need so much money to ask legislation to change their laws. I do not wish to give my support to an organization that has made NO progress in the past year. I do not wish to donate to a law being changed that will cause taxes to be raised to pay for the devices you would like to make “mandatory”. In fact, I would greatly appreciate your reimbursement of the original donation I have made as I have recently witnessed a person who caused an accident because they were drinking and driving yet did not get a ticket for the DUI let alone a mandatory ignition interlock.
As wonderful as the ignition interlock device sounds, it still would not prevent driving under the influence. The device does not send a signal to the authorities and give the plate number of the driver to which the authorities could seek out the offender and take them in. The device simply keeps a record that may not be checked for 30 days and in some cases up to 90 days. The driver has at least an entire month to keep drinking and driving. This is not to mention that an ignition interlock device would only be put on a vehicle AFTER an incident has already occurred, or that someone else could blow into the device once it is placed in a vehicle, regardless of how many times it may need to be blown into. The ignition interlock would also not be able to detect a person under the influence of marijuana, cocaine, heroin, prescribed medication, and any other drug that would also impair a person’s ability to drive a vehicle.
Keep the original donation as my gift to you for suckering me into donating in the first place with your bologna sob stories. Please take me off your call and mailing list as the information you have for me is my work environment and it is extremely unprofessional to be spammed at work when all I thought I was doing was being nice by making the initial donation without questioning why I was sending it at all. I suggest you gear your organization toward the education of the importance of safe driving to people of all ages, but specifically the younger generations. Start at the root of the problem, not after the problem has occurred. Prevent these situations at all through education at an early age rather than try to prevent something that has already happened. Start a program with the local department of transportation instead of trying to change laws.
Good luck.
Sarah M
Thursday, April 23, 2009
So much idiocy, So little time
Well it seems March got away from me. That's not to say I haven't been chock full of annoyance by the stupidity I see every day, I just haven't had the time to complain about it. Some kid who decided it would be better to be a robber than get a job stole my lap top. My office has restricted most sites that are not work related. The people I am usually referring to have gone and surpassed the amount of stupid I thought possible for them and caused a drinking related incident once again. And to top it off, I have been supporting one of those people who took my advice to remain a loser for the rest of their lives...or at least I say they took my advice, since they don't actually have a computer to read any of this anyhow as they don't have a job but still need to borrow money for diapers and cigarettes.
No, I haven't come anywhere close to not having something to write about, and don't believe I will until humanity ceases to exist. Unfortunately the posts will be few and far between until I re-invest in someones else's future by purchasing myself something else for a job-less loser to steal.
Until then I remain bitterly yours,
Sarah M.
No, I haven't come anywhere close to not having something to write about, and don't believe I will until humanity ceases to exist. Unfortunately the posts will be few and far between until I re-invest in someones else's future by purchasing myself something else for a job-less loser to steal.
Until then I remain bitterly yours,
Sarah M.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
things that dont exist, but should - take one
The Perfect Man.
Now before you get all hot under the collar and want to tell me the perfect man does exist, take a closer look at who you think you are referring to...is it you? Well then, you are already wrong. Ladies, is it your man? You are still wrong. Anyone who would like to say something like "Clooney" "Pitt" or "Depp" - have you ever met these people? I'm sure they don't give any more of a shit about you than the other hot guy you tried picking up at the bar the other night, so you are also wrong.
Every once in a blue a guy can certainly come close to seeming like a perfect man - This is usually called "dating" - A guy will actually seem interested, and interesting, when he is trying to get something - But don't be fooled, this charmer will turn into a frog the second things become routine - The game is over, now so is his attempt at being "the perfect man"
It doesn't matter how hot he is, hes a dick - If hes not a dick, hes inattentive - If hes not a dick, and caters to your needs, hes a pussy - And if hes a strong but sensitive man, who wants to listen to you and wine and dine you, his boyfriend will probably invite you over for dinner sometime soon!
For a man to be perfect he would have to put others first - He would have to love to cook and clean - He would have to be nurturing and kind-hearted while maintaining command - He would have to stand up for what is right even when everyone else is going against his curve - In short, he would have to be a woman
Now before you get all hot under the collar and want to tell me the perfect man does exist, take a closer look at who you think you are referring to...is it you? Well then, you are already wrong. Ladies, is it your man? You are still wrong. Anyone who would like to say something like "Clooney" "Pitt" or "Depp" - have you ever met these people? I'm sure they don't give any more of a shit about you than the other hot guy you tried picking up at the bar the other night, so you are also wrong.
Every once in a blue a guy can certainly come close to seeming like a perfect man - This is usually called "dating" - A guy will actually seem interested, and interesting, when he is trying to get something - But don't be fooled, this charmer will turn into a frog the second things become routine - The game is over, now so is his attempt at being "the perfect man"
It doesn't matter how hot he is, hes a dick - If hes not a dick, hes inattentive - If hes not a dick, and caters to your needs, hes a pussy - And if hes a strong but sensitive man, who wants to listen to you and wine and dine you, his boyfriend will probably invite you over for dinner sometime soon!
For a man to be perfect he would have to put others first - He would have to love to cook and clean - He would have to be nurturing and kind-hearted while maintaining command - He would have to stand up for what is right even when everyone else is going against his curve - In short, he would have to be a woman
No, the perfect man is definitely not something that exists, but should. If men were perfect, life would be so much better. No more ego to deal with, no more stupidity to make excuses for, and in the long run, no more men! We would phase them out through natural selection and eventually the world would become one huge Paradise Island, Themyscira, and hopefully we would all get super powers and cool Wonder Woman wrist bands...
Lasso of Truthfully yours,
Sarah M.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
things that are overrated - take two
Your Self Esteem.
For as selfish as people are, no one really likes themselves. There is always something more, something better, something different you could be, but you won't try to be because you don't actually believe you can be. And that is perfectly OK.
There is no reason to believe you could be better than what you are. If you believe it, you might actually want to do it, and that means doing work. You know your work will only be sub-par so why bother in the first place? Yes, it's just plain useless to like yourself enough to change your shitty situation. Your already a champion drinker and you have so many friends you don't know what to do with...your happy...so there is nothing else you need anyway.
Ladies, ever rethink that abusive relationship your in? Don't bother. Out of the 6+ billion people in this world, you wont find anyone else better so you might as well just get used to getting your ass beat when your man comes home every night. I know, I know...he doesn't mean it, they never do...just keep reminding yourself he hits you because he loves you and you might get a shiny new necklace out of it when he sobers up and feels bad. After all, he has already banned you from leaving the house in fear of you having a good time without him or fucking every guy you might pass on the street, so who cares if your body is covered in bruises? No one will see them but you.
Relationship not going so well, kids? Just get pregnant. It doesn't matter that your not old enough to legally drink yet, or that you don't have a job...if you have a baby, you will always have someone who loves you. You aren't in school and your boyfriend doesn't want you anymore, but that baby needs you so it must mean your life is worth something, right? You certainly aren't going to end up raising one more person in this country that also doesn't want to work hard and feels it's their right to be on welfare. If you do, that's fine too, your son will just sue someone for something that was probably their own fault for being stupid and you will have the money you always hoped your children would have. At least you will now be able to afford all those friends you keep around to help you feel popular!
I didn't forget about you either Mr. Addict. The money you steal from other people to pay for your problems is actually helping the drug dealer support the baby his girlfriend wanted, so keep it up big guy, the economy needs you right now. When you sit at the bar all weekend, you are making sure that establishment will not go out of business. When you drunkenly stumble to your car so you can get home to beat your wife for not vacuuming under the refrigerator, you keep the cops from slacking at their job. You are as much of a winner as you will ever be. Embrace it.
Now that you feel justified for being a loser, and a lazy one at that, keep up the good work...if you can call doing nothing with your life "work". Being around you makes everyone else realize they don't hate themselves as much as they thought. If you weren't a failure, how would we know who the winners were? Thank you for making me look better as a person.
unequally yours,
Sarah M.
For as selfish as people are, no one really likes themselves. There is always something more, something better, something different you could be, but you won't try to be because you don't actually believe you can be. And that is perfectly OK.
There is no reason to believe you could be better than what you are. If you believe it, you might actually want to do it, and that means doing work. You know your work will only be sub-par so why bother in the first place? Yes, it's just plain useless to like yourself enough to change your shitty situation. Your already a champion drinker and you have so many friends you don't know what to do with...your happy...so there is nothing else you need anyway.
Ladies, ever rethink that abusive relationship your in? Don't bother. Out of the 6+ billion people in this world, you wont find anyone else better so you might as well just get used to getting your ass beat when your man comes home every night. I know, I know...he doesn't mean it, they never do...just keep reminding yourself he hits you because he loves you and you might get a shiny new necklace out of it when he sobers up and feels bad. After all, he has already banned you from leaving the house in fear of you having a good time without him or fucking every guy you might pass on the street, so who cares if your body is covered in bruises? No one will see them but you.
Relationship not going so well, kids? Just get pregnant. It doesn't matter that your not old enough to legally drink yet, or that you don't have a job...if you have a baby, you will always have someone who loves you. You aren't in school and your boyfriend doesn't want you anymore, but that baby needs you so it must mean your life is worth something, right? You certainly aren't going to end up raising one more person in this country that also doesn't want to work hard and feels it's their right to be on welfare. If you do, that's fine too, your son will just sue someone for something that was probably their own fault for being stupid and you will have the money you always hoped your children would have. At least you will now be able to afford all those friends you keep around to help you feel popular!
I didn't forget about you either Mr. Addict. The money you steal from other people to pay for your problems is actually helping the drug dealer support the baby his girlfriend wanted, so keep it up big guy, the economy needs you right now. When you sit at the bar all weekend, you are making sure that establishment will not go out of business. When you drunkenly stumble to your car so you can get home to beat your wife for not vacuuming under the refrigerator, you keep the cops from slacking at their job. You are as much of a winner as you will ever be. Embrace it.
Now that you feel justified for being a loser, and a lazy one at that, keep up the good work...if you can call doing nothing with your life "work". Being around you makes everyone else realize they don't hate themselves as much as they thought. If you weren't a failure, how would we know who the winners were? Thank you for making me look better as a person.
unequally yours,
Sarah M.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
MADD is really starting to piss me off
In case you don't know, MADD is the acronym for the organization that is "Mothers Against Drunk Driving" - this a group of people who are, you guessed it, against drunk driving - they are like any other charity with their hand out and their lies convincing - they call and give you a sob story about someone, usually female, who was killed in a car accident - they then tell you how you can help prevent things like this from happening again with your donation.
BULLSHIT.
About two months ago I mistakenly thought a charitable donation would be polite, and a good thing to do for my society, so when I got the call, I agreed for them to send me the donation slip. When the slip arrived, I put it to the side and wound up forgetting about it, or at least I tried to. The donation slip was followed by another donation slip reminding me I had not sent the last one. I also left this to be done later and forgot again. The second donation slip was followed up by a phone call asking where my donation was. I told them I must have misplaced the paperwork and to send another. It arrived without delay so I filled it out immediately and returned my whopping donation of $40. Once the donation was made I thought I was in the clear. I was mistaken again.
Once the donation was entered on their list of suckers, I received a call to thank me for the donation and inquire if I would like to donate again. I informed them I had already donated and I would be picking another charity the next time I wanted to support something. I was forced to listen to another sob story and still declined. I was cut off while declining to be told another type of donation I can make to their organization. I declined again. I was cut off again and asked if they could just send me some paperwork and I agreed so I could go about my day. I was sent another donation slip. The same process happened again, only this time, when they called I had to explain that I never agreed to make another donation. The reply I received was shocking. I was told they had me noted for a donation and I was OBLIGATED to pay it. I kindly said "no I don't" and hung up.
I have since been contacted via phone and mail 4 times with more information and more requests for donations. I have explained that I do not donate to the same organization twice unless I see what they are doing to change the law for the better, and how well their plan was executed. Obviously I have not seen a decline in drivers who are under the influence, nor have I seen a single law changed. However, I have been increasingly bothered by a bunch of people who believe their solicitation is doing anything to help. I saw, first hand, the effect of drinking and driving and the accident that resulted and the person responsible didn't so much as get a DUI
So, MADD, leave me the hell alone. I do NOT want to donate any more money to a plan that would change a law that would in turn make me pay more taxes, and I do NOT want to be conned into donating because it is the only way people will donate to your cause. Why don't you call the president and ask him to do something about it? Better yet, why don't you change your plan to one that involves teaching your children they shouldn't drink and drive and try to prevent these kind of things from happening rather than try to get a Breathalyzer strapped to every car AFTER something has already happened? Stop being useless story tellers on the phone, and start being more active with the young adults in your lives. Educate people, don't just cry and put your hand out.
MADDeningly yours,
Sarah M.
BULLSHIT.
About two months ago I mistakenly thought a charitable donation would be polite, and a good thing to do for my society, so when I got the call, I agreed for them to send me the donation slip. When the slip arrived, I put it to the side and wound up forgetting about it, or at least I tried to. The donation slip was followed by another donation slip reminding me I had not sent the last one. I also left this to be done later and forgot again. The second donation slip was followed up by a phone call asking where my donation was. I told them I must have misplaced the paperwork and to send another. It arrived without delay so I filled it out immediately and returned my whopping donation of $40. Once the donation was made I thought I was in the clear. I was mistaken again.
Once the donation was entered on their list of suckers, I received a call to thank me for the donation and inquire if I would like to donate again. I informed them I had already donated and I would be picking another charity the next time I wanted to support something. I was forced to listen to another sob story and still declined. I was cut off while declining to be told another type of donation I can make to their organization. I declined again. I was cut off again and asked if they could just send me some paperwork and I agreed so I could go about my day. I was sent another donation slip. The same process happened again, only this time, when they called I had to explain that I never agreed to make another donation. The reply I received was shocking. I was told they had me noted for a donation and I was OBLIGATED to pay it. I kindly said "no I don't" and hung up.
I have since been contacted via phone and mail 4 times with more information and more requests for donations. I have explained that I do not donate to the same organization twice unless I see what they are doing to change the law for the better, and how well their plan was executed. Obviously I have not seen a decline in drivers who are under the influence, nor have I seen a single law changed. However, I have been increasingly bothered by a bunch of people who believe their solicitation is doing anything to help. I saw, first hand, the effect of drinking and driving and the accident that resulted and the person responsible didn't so much as get a DUI
So, MADD, leave me the hell alone. I do NOT want to donate any more money to a plan that would change a law that would in turn make me pay more taxes, and I do NOT want to be conned into donating because it is the only way people will donate to your cause. Why don't you call the president and ask him to do something about it? Better yet, why don't you change your plan to one that involves teaching your children they shouldn't drink and drive and try to prevent these kind of things from happening rather than try to get a Breathalyzer strapped to every car AFTER something has already happened? Stop being useless story tellers on the phone, and start being more active with the young adults in your lives. Educate people, don't just cry and put your hand out.
MADDeningly yours,
Sarah M.
Friday, January 30, 2009
I'm not lookin' to catch any flies
In my line of work, everything needs to be done "IMMEDIATELY!!!!" - Everything is a "rush" - Everything is due tomorrow - Everything is critical - And try as one might, no one is ever compliant or nice - Rarely is anything just done right the first time and there is no stress
My parents (well, more like my mom) raised me on old school metaphors - There were always the ones that made sense like "Don't count your chickens before they hatch", which means you shouldn't expect anything to happen until it does, you should only do the work and be hopeful it turns out right because life is unpredictable - OK, got it. - But there were always other ones that were silly
In this instance, the silly one is "You catch more flies with honey than vinegar" - Well, I'm not looking to catch any flies, I'm looking to get shit done, and in the corporate world, its quite rare you will find someone willing to do something for you just because you were nice about it - Quite the contrary actually - If you want something done fast or at all, you have to harass people day after day and when they still don't comply, you have to threaten them with a court appearance
I would love to say this is just because the corporate world is "dog eat dog" as it were, but this is simply not the case - No, people in general don't respond to the polite approach anymore - When people are polite, other people take advantage of the politeness - Ever hold a door for someone and everyone assumes you are holding it for them and no one takes the door while you stand there like a fool and end up being late for work only to be reprimanded for not calling ahead of time if you would be late? Well if you haven't, then you are one of those assholes who would walk right through that door and not even say "thank you" as you walked by - Stop being so selfish you jerk.
The solution: always be a dick - When you are an asshole, that forces the other person to be the nice guy you can take advantage of - You can only get ahead in life by stepping on the faces of people who are willing to let you take their credit or on the toes of the people who are holding the door for you while you yell on your cell phone to your poor secretary who has been in the office for the past two hours trying to get you ready for the meeting you told her about at 4:58 last night - you deserve this big guy, you worked hard to be a douche bag
hurriedly yours,
Sarah M.
My parents (well, more like my mom) raised me on old school metaphors - There were always the ones that made sense like "Don't count your chickens before they hatch", which means you shouldn't expect anything to happen until it does, you should only do the work and be hopeful it turns out right because life is unpredictable - OK, got it. - But there were always other ones that were silly
In this instance, the silly one is "You catch more flies with honey than vinegar" - Well, I'm not looking to catch any flies, I'm looking to get shit done, and in the corporate world, its quite rare you will find someone willing to do something for you just because you were nice about it - Quite the contrary actually - If you want something done fast or at all, you have to harass people day after day and when they still don't comply, you have to threaten them with a court appearance
I would love to say this is just because the corporate world is "dog eat dog" as it were, but this is simply not the case - No, people in general don't respond to the polite approach anymore - When people are polite, other people take advantage of the politeness - Ever hold a door for someone and everyone assumes you are holding it for them and no one takes the door while you stand there like a fool and end up being late for work only to be reprimanded for not calling ahead of time if you would be late? Well if you haven't, then you are one of those assholes who would walk right through that door and not even say "thank you" as you walked by - Stop being so selfish you jerk.
The solution: always be a dick - When you are an asshole, that forces the other person to be the nice guy you can take advantage of - You can only get ahead in life by stepping on the faces of people who are willing to let you take their credit or on the toes of the people who are holding the door for you while you yell on your cell phone to your poor secretary who has been in the office for the past two hours trying to get you ready for the meeting you told her about at 4:58 last night - you deserve this big guy, you worked hard to be a douche bag
hurriedly yours,
Sarah M.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
how to survive a zombie attack
As a friend of Heather and Nikki, I have learned to always be prepared...for zombies
Zombies are a very real threat - The epidemic is a sneaky and fast spreading one - All it takes is one little nibble and there you are, one of the un-dead - The only way to beat it, is to over come it, and you do that by staying alive...so here are some tips on how to survive a zombie attack
First things first, and this should be an obvious one, DO NOT become a zombie - You will become more interested in eating brains than shooting your fellow zombies in the head, so just don't do it! At the sign of the first moaning, incoherent person you see, pick up a form of weaponry and get the fuck out of there! You might want to double check if its early in the morning or before your boss has had their coffee - Sometimes people you may think are zombies are really regular people who are hungover or just plain tired...you don't want to get fired for bludgeoning your boss in the face with your stapler when there really is no threat of a zombie take over - Then you are shit out of luck for an extra place to go when the zombies DO attack
Most zombies became zombies because they were too trusting of zombie family members - Zombies always go after their own kin first, just like vampires...easy pickin's! - So if you are late to rise and didn't get a chance to leave your house before you noticed the zombies, pick up a form of weaponry and get the fuck out of there! Your mom is NOT checking to see if you got up for school yet, shes checking to see if your brains are still nice and human for the eating - Your grandfather is NOT trying to give you a hug, he is trying to bite your face off - Kill them both and roll out
This is a great time to discuss types of weaponry - An important fact is the longer the range, the better the weapon - while throwing hard objects is always a quick way out, it wont last forever...once you throw something, if its not on a string, you would have to retrieve it, and trust me, you aren't getting out alive if you run into a crowd of zombies to pick up the stapler you thew when you realized your boss was, in fact, a zombie - Guns, rifles, cross-bows, cannons, missile launchers and bazookas are great...but all require ammo, so have a back up! Anything that blows up will give you time you might not have had without it, but the ultimate weapon in zombie killing is a sword, preferably a samurai sword (e.g. katana: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Katana) - if you don't have one, don't worry, a long piece of wood, preferably one with a sharpened edge, or with knives affixed to the side would be an OK substitute until you looted a place that would have a samurai sword...and yes, it is OK to loot when zombies are attacking - When everyone is fighting for their life, ethics go out the window
ALWAYS aim for the head - zombies will get back up if you don't destroy their brains - don't hold out and hope that a zombie will eat another zombie - they are oblivious to each other as they are to everything that is not human - a zombie's sole purpose is to feed on humans so they do not decompose into nothing - even when you are the un-dead you look out for yourself, because people are selfish...even in the afterlife
So now that you've got your make-shift sword and you've officially gotten the fuck out of there, where are you going? The entire neighborhood is full of zombies and you just killed your mom and grandpa - Naturally, you are coming to find me! You will only last so long on your own, so form a group with every person you find that is not a zombie and get on the move, however if a person is nicked, leave them behind, they will only end up eating you later if you keep them around
If you have nothing to fight for, you wont be able to keep up the struggle, so just keep thinking about this blog and how my friends and I are just relaxing, killing zombies and waiting to start the new world order since we are always prepared for a zombie attack and will of course have everything under control where we are - Unfortunately, I can not disclose the whereabouts of our company until after the zombies have attacked - If a person who reads this blog becomes a zombie before anyone really notices there are zombies, we would all be screwed - So get yourself to a radio station and try to find our signal - if you cant pick up a signal, try getting to a computer to read this blog, I will no doubt be bitching about how zombies are just like drunks
Now you know how to survive a zombie attack - To be extra prepared, take up fencing or archery - To be even more prepared, make sure your friends read this post and you all discuss your own plan for surviving zombies - There is never a limit to how prepared you are against the supernatural - Good luck! I anticipate saving your life someday!
vitally yours,
Sarah M.
Zombies are a very real threat - The epidemic is a sneaky and fast spreading one - All it takes is one little nibble and there you are, one of the un-dead - The only way to beat it, is to over come it, and you do that by staying alive...so here are some tips on how to survive a zombie attack
First things first, and this should be an obvious one, DO NOT become a zombie - You will become more interested in eating brains than shooting your fellow zombies in the head, so just don't do it! At the sign of the first moaning, incoherent person you see, pick up a form of weaponry and get the fuck out of there! You might want to double check if its early in the morning or before your boss has had their coffee - Sometimes people you may think are zombies are really regular people who are hungover or just plain tired...you don't want to get fired for bludgeoning your boss in the face with your stapler when there really is no threat of a zombie take over - Then you are shit out of luck for an extra place to go when the zombies DO attack
Most zombies became zombies because they were too trusting of zombie family members - Zombies always go after their own kin first, just like vampires...easy pickin's! - So if you are late to rise and didn't get a chance to leave your house before you noticed the zombies, pick up a form of weaponry and get the fuck out of there! Your mom is NOT checking to see if you got up for school yet, shes checking to see if your brains are still nice and human for the eating - Your grandfather is NOT trying to give you a hug, he is trying to bite your face off - Kill them both and roll out
This is a great time to discuss types of weaponry - An important fact is the longer the range, the better the weapon - while throwing hard objects is always a quick way out, it wont last forever...once you throw something, if its not on a string, you would have to retrieve it, and trust me, you aren't getting out alive if you run into a crowd of zombies to pick up the stapler you thew when you realized your boss was, in fact, a zombie - Guns, rifles, cross-bows, cannons, missile launchers and bazookas are great...but all require ammo, so have a back up! Anything that blows up will give you time you might not have had without it, but the ultimate weapon in zombie killing is a sword, preferably a samurai sword (e.g. katana: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Katana) - if you don't have one, don't worry, a long piece of wood, preferably one with a sharpened edge, or with knives affixed to the side would be an OK substitute until you looted a place that would have a samurai sword...and yes, it is OK to loot when zombies are attacking - When everyone is fighting for their life, ethics go out the window
ALWAYS aim for the head - zombies will get back up if you don't destroy their brains - don't hold out and hope that a zombie will eat another zombie - they are oblivious to each other as they are to everything that is not human - a zombie's sole purpose is to feed on humans so they do not decompose into nothing - even when you are the un-dead you look out for yourself, because people are selfish...even in the afterlife
So now that you've got your make-shift sword and you've officially gotten the fuck out of there, where are you going? The entire neighborhood is full of zombies and you just killed your mom and grandpa - Naturally, you are coming to find me! You will only last so long on your own, so form a group with every person you find that is not a zombie and get on the move, however if a person is nicked, leave them behind, they will only end up eating you later if you keep them around
If you have nothing to fight for, you wont be able to keep up the struggle, so just keep thinking about this blog and how my friends and I are just relaxing, killing zombies and waiting to start the new world order since we are always prepared for a zombie attack and will of course have everything under control where we are - Unfortunately, I can not disclose the whereabouts of our company until after the zombies have attacked - If a person who reads this blog becomes a zombie before anyone really notices there are zombies, we would all be screwed - So get yourself to a radio station and try to find our signal - if you cant pick up a signal, try getting to a computer to read this blog, I will no doubt be bitching about how zombies are just like drunks
Now you know how to survive a zombie attack - To be extra prepared, take up fencing or archery - To be even more prepared, make sure your friends read this post and you all discuss your own plan for surviving zombies - There is never a limit to how prepared you are against the supernatural - Good luck! I anticipate saving your life someday!
vitally yours,
Sarah M.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
things that are overrated - take one
Friends.
Everyone wants a friend - Everyone wants to be a friend - But where do friends get you? No where.
I'm not talking about the "friends in high places" because, lets face it, those people aren't actually your friends, they are using you like you are using them to get better things - No, I'm talking about the average, everyday, run of the mill pain in the asses that you hang out with because that makes you happy - why does it make you happy? because having lots of friends means you are popular and being popular is very socially acceptable - in fact, it seems like it is one of life's most craved goals
Friends are about as useful as a pet - with the exception that a pet can't talk back, or steal your money...or your boyfriend - you have to feed them, entertain them, clean up after them...you even have to buy them things on their birthday or on Christmas - friends are nothing more than another monthly, possibly weekly, expense
Most people only care about themselves - the more friends you have, the more people you have to pretend to give a shit about - None of these people care about you, just like you don't really care about them, but you put on the facade because after all, being popular makes you happy
The same "friends" you would ditch to hang out with someone better are the people who would no sooner stab you in the back because one of their friends didn't like you - The same "friends" you gossip about when they aren't around are the people who post pictures of your bare ass being escorted out of a club for stripping to your birthday suit and dancing on the bar on their facebooks and myspaces
So my advice to you is to tell all your friends what you really think about them - if you do, it will make not hanging out with them much easier to accomplish since you are now no longer popular - get yourself a pet...probably a cat - and stop drinking so much - No one wants to see your bare ass dancing on a bar
friendlessly yours,
Sarah M.
Everyone wants a friend - Everyone wants to be a friend - But where do friends get you? No where.
I'm not talking about the "friends in high places" because, lets face it, those people aren't actually your friends, they are using you like you are using them to get better things - No, I'm talking about the average, everyday, run of the mill pain in the asses that you hang out with because that makes you happy - why does it make you happy? because having lots of friends means you are popular and being popular is very socially acceptable - in fact, it seems like it is one of life's most craved goals
Friends are about as useful as a pet - with the exception that a pet can't talk back, or steal your money...or your boyfriend - you have to feed them, entertain them, clean up after them...you even have to buy them things on their birthday or on Christmas - friends are nothing more than another monthly, possibly weekly, expense
Most people only care about themselves - the more friends you have, the more people you have to pretend to give a shit about - None of these people care about you, just like you don't really care about them, but you put on the facade because after all, being popular makes you happy
The same "friends" you would ditch to hang out with someone better are the people who would no sooner stab you in the back because one of their friends didn't like you - The same "friends" you gossip about when they aren't around are the people who post pictures of your bare ass being escorted out of a club for stripping to your birthday suit and dancing on the bar on their facebooks and myspaces
So my advice to you is to tell all your friends what you really think about them - if you do, it will make not hanging out with them much easier to accomplish since you are now no longer popular - get yourself a pet...probably a cat - and stop drinking so much - No one wants to see your bare ass dancing on a bar
friendlessly yours,
Sarah M.
you are American-American, not "Insert County Here"-American
With the inauguration of our first "African-American" President, I have to point out that I hate the classification of "Insert County Here"-American
If you are born in France to American parents, you are not an American-French, you are American (after 1994 of course) - and as is so with any other country
Maybe you love your heritage or culture, maybe you identify more with one than another, but if you were born in America to residents of America, you are an American, a U.S. citizen - Even if your parent's were not born as U.S. citizens, if you are born here, you are American - so stop trying to identify yourself as something you are not - it only makes things like racism more predominant in a country where most of us could trace our heritage back to every culture or race seeing as America is the original "Melting-Pot"
What should be a positive type of classification, to have one not forget their roots, is becoming a means to believe you are different or better than anyone else born in this county - just because your skin is darker or lighter than anyone else does not make you better or worse - it does not change your ability to learn or get sick - it does not stop you from growing old or practicing any religion you choose - in fact no matter how much your skin does or does not match the color of someone else, everyone has their own complexion - pimples, rashes, wrinkles, oil, dry spots etc. - I'm not a "light oily skinned"-American, I'm just an American
So knock it off Mr. President...you, along with everyone else that decides race is determined by how you look, are incorrect - according to this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Race_and_ethnicity_in_the_United_States_Census, you would be "White American" from your mom being an American with European descendants, "African-American" from your dad being Kenyan, and "Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific Islander" from being born in Honolulu - you sir are a "mutt" like most of us...why only identify with one? Why not bring the positive message that we are all from different cultures, but what keeps us common to each other is that we are all Americans? Is the idea of being a native of a country full of free individuals with the right to speak up and be involved in our government not something we should want to identify with?
Drop your label, even for a day - It might change your perspective on things, because you can be "Japanese, Indian, Canadian"-American, but it doesn't make you any less American - Buy yourself an American flag, put it in your front yard or hang it from a window - Celebrate your freedom instead of your differences - Create your own traditions - And most importantly, pay your taxes!
Americanly Yours,
Sarah M.
If you are born in France to American parents, you are not an American-French, you are American (after 1994 of course) - and as is so with any other country
Maybe you love your heritage or culture, maybe you identify more with one than another, but if you were born in America to residents of America, you are an American, a U.S. citizen - Even if your parent's were not born as U.S. citizens, if you are born here, you are American - so stop trying to identify yourself as something you are not - it only makes things like racism more predominant in a country where most of us could trace our heritage back to every culture or race seeing as America is the original "Melting-Pot"
What should be a positive type of classification, to have one not forget their roots, is becoming a means to believe you are different or better than anyone else born in this county - just because your skin is darker or lighter than anyone else does not make you better or worse - it does not change your ability to learn or get sick - it does not stop you from growing old or practicing any religion you choose - in fact no matter how much your skin does or does not match the color of someone else, everyone has their own complexion - pimples, rashes, wrinkles, oil, dry spots etc. - I'm not a "light oily skinned"-American, I'm just an American
So knock it off Mr. President...you, along with everyone else that decides race is determined by how you look, are incorrect - according to this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Race_and_ethnicity_in_the_United_States_Census, you would be "White American" from your mom being an American with European descendants, "African-American" from your dad being Kenyan, and "Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific Islander" from being born in Honolulu - you sir are a "mutt" like most of us...why only identify with one? Why not bring the positive message that we are all from different cultures, but what keeps us common to each other is that we are all Americans? Is the idea of being a native of a country full of free individuals with the right to speak up and be involved in our government not something we should want to identify with?
Drop your label, even for a day - It might change your perspective on things, because you can be "Japanese, Indian, Canadian"-American, but it doesn't make you any less American - Buy yourself an American flag, put it in your front yard or hang it from a window - Celebrate your freedom instead of your differences - Create your own traditions - And most importantly, pay your taxes!
Americanly Yours,
Sarah M.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Snow Day
It doesn't matter how old I get, or how much I hate the cold weather - It doesn't matter how much I'll ache the next day from working body parts I haven't used since the summer - There is just something so awesome about fresh, white snow that makes the kid in me peek out the window and turn on the TV hoping for a snow day so I can stay home and play in it!
Unfortunately, living in a relatively busy and populated city, our transit system puts salt down the night before snow is expected and streets are shoveled way before anyone gets up - We have to get about six inches overnight and have the snow fall steady through to the morning to hope for a day off - Clearly much more than the few inches it took to get off from school...damn being a working adult
Still, I couldn't help but just want to get off my train this morning and make a snow-angel at the North Philadelphia Train Station when I saw they had cleared most, but not all the snow that had fallen yesterday - It was only about an inch or so, but there was so much untouched snow...it was beautiful, and it wanted me to play in it as much as I did
Snow forts are my favorite - Since I was strong enough to pull a sled full of snow I made snow forts with my brother or my friends or just by myself - I always loved to dig or shovel snow (or sand, my favorite part of the beach) and even if I couldn't finish the fort, at least I had cleared a few of my neighbors properties for them - Of course that meant my parents were left to break down all the snow I carried from our neighbors property to ours in an attempt to build something I would forget about once my mom called me in to warm up and have some lunch - Luckily my sister loved to make snowmen and that's how most of my forts ended up
Snowmen are pointless, there isn't enough digging involved, and once your done you cant really play with them - you can dress them up and watch your mom scream when she finds out you used the "good" scarf your grandmother just bought you for Christmas, but you cant tunnel through them - A magic hat never blows onto your property to make your snowman come to life, but strangely enough you watch him slowly die every day it gets a little warmer - Yeah, snowmen are pointless...unless you are sledding into them for destruction
Sledding is AWESOME - especially with those plastic round sleds you always try to spin before you go down the hill and wind up riding all the way down the hill backwards, never expecting the tail bone shattering bump that flips you upside down and face first into the dirty snow - as the day went on the snow got thinner and dirtier but all the more fast and dangerous - I really hope this is how snowboarding turns out
I will be going to Colorado for a snowboarding trip the first weekend in February - Look out for my feelings on it in "Snow Day 2"
Warm, dry, and bitterly yours,
Sarah M.
Unfortunately, living in a relatively busy and populated city, our transit system puts salt down the night before snow is expected and streets are shoveled way before anyone gets up - We have to get about six inches overnight and have the snow fall steady through to the morning to hope for a day off - Clearly much more than the few inches it took to get off from school...damn being a working adult
Still, I couldn't help but just want to get off my train this morning and make a snow-angel at the North Philadelphia Train Station when I saw they had cleared most, but not all the snow that had fallen yesterday - It was only about an inch or so, but there was so much untouched snow...it was beautiful, and it wanted me to play in it as much as I did
Snow forts are my favorite - Since I was strong enough to pull a sled full of snow I made snow forts with my brother or my friends or just by myself - I always loved to dig or shovel snow (or sand, my favorite part of the beach) and even if I couldn't finish the fort, at least I had cleared a few of my neighbors properties for them - Of course that meant my parents were left to break down all the snow I carried from our neighbors property to ours in an attempt to build something I would forget about once my mom called me in to warm up and have some lunch - Luckily my sister loved to make snowmen and that's how most of my forts ended up
Snowmen are pointless, there isn't enough digging involved, and once your done you cant really play with them - you can dress them up and watch your mom scream when she finds out you used the "good" scarf your grandmother just bought you for Christmas, but you cant tunnel through them - A magic hat never blows onto your property to make your snowman come to life, but strangely enough you watch him slowly die every day it gets a little warmer - Yeah, snowmen are pointless...unless you are sledding into them for destruction
Sledding is AWESOME - especially with those plastic round sleds you always try to spin before you go down the hill and wind up riding all the way down the hill backwards, never expecting the tail bone shattering bump that flips you upside down and face first into the dirty snow - as the day went on the snow got thinner and dirtier but all the more fast and dangerous - I really hope this is how snowboarding turns out
I will be going to Colorado for a snowboarding trip the first weekend in February - Look out for my feelings on it in "Snow Day 2"
Warm, dry, and bitterly yours,
Sarah M.
Friday, January 16, 2009
KEEP that frown upside down
In this day and age, well, in this day and age in AMERICA it is looked down on to be a genuinely happy person - this is because there is no reason to be happy if you are an American - even our upper class isn't satisfied - our A-listers have subcategories
If you are happy, you are either on medication or you need to be - your kid is energetic and enjoys running around? He has ADHD, put him on Ritalin - your mom is middle aged and just doesn't have that vitality she once had? Time to suggest anti-depressants!
If this is not the case then you are drunk - drinking is the middle class dream - we work hard for our money, why wouldn't we want to spend it all on binge drinking and feeling like shit the next day? It makes us feel happy so that must mean we are happy...oh, you can drink like a camel and not feel like shit the next day? You, sir, must be a champion and not an alcoholic at all!! Congratulations!
And that girl who goes "oh I don't drink, I don't need to get drunk to have a good time" she has a spoon up her nose for damn sure. If she doesn't, check out her super cool wristbands or her appropriate length skirt...shes a cutter.
We need our things to MAKE us happy, because there is nothing to just plain be happy about - and when we find someone who seems happy, we gossip about what must be wrong with them because there is no reason to be happy if you are an American
So do yourself a favor and just always look miserable - no one will ever think you are crazy or drunk or "special" - people will respect you for it, embrace you for it, and you will be a better person for it
miserably yours,
Sarah M.
If you are happy, you are either on medication or you need to be - your kid is energetic and enjoys running around? He has ADHD, put him on Ritalin - your mom is middle aged and just doesn't have that vitality she once had? Time to suggest anti-depressants!
If this is not the case then you are drunk - drinking is the middle class dream - we work hard for our money, why wouldn't we want to spend it all on binge drinking and feeling like shit the next day? It makes us feel happy so that must mean we are happy...oh, you can drink like a camel and not feel like shit the next day? You, sir, must be a champion and not an alcoholic at all!! Congratulations!
And that girl who goes "oh I don't drink, I don't need to get drunk to have a good time" she has a spoon up her nose for damn sure. If she doesn't, check out her super cool wristbands or her appropriate length skirt...shes a cutter.
We need our things to MAKE us happy, because there is nothing to just plain be happy about - and when we find someone who seems happy, we gossip about what must be wrong with them because there is no reason to be happy if you are an American
So do yourself a favor and just always look miserable - no one will ever think you are crazy or drunk or "special" - people will respect you for it, embrace you for it, and you will be a better person for it
miserably yours,
Sarah M.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Entry #1
well, you guessed it - this is just one more blog for someone on the Internet to jot their ideas, bitch about nothing, and stalk other blogging friends
I've wanted to start a new one outside of livejournal...yes people still use livejournal...so thank you heather and nikki for giving me the kick in the ass I needed - I hope to be a frequent guest writer on your blog, or about your blog, as I have already expressed to you my want of producing the Heather & Nikki show
here's to hoping this one turns out less sucky than the crap I have over at live journal or the non existent ones I have on facebook and myspace! just one more blog, but hopefully nothing like the rest!
excitedly yours,
Sarah M.
I've wanted to start a new one outside of livejournal...yes people still use livejournal...so thank you heather and nikki for giving me the kick in the ass I needed - I hope to be a frequent guest writer on your blog, or about your blog, as I have already expressed to you my want of producing the Heather & Nikki show
here's to hoping this one turns out less sucky than the crap I have over at live journal or the non existent ones I have on facebook and myspace! just one more blog, but hopefully nothing like the rest!
excitedly yours,
Sarah M.
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